Maryum Khwaja, LCSW, Nasiha Counselling and the Bleuler Psychotherapy Center
By Petra Halbur
For many therapists, religion and spirituality are difficult subjects to broach with their clients. But according to clinical social worker Maryum Khwaja (cofounder of Nasiha Counseling, a private practice that specializes in working with Muslim clients), they can be essential, transformative resources for healing. “Even if people aren’t from my [Muslim] faith background,” she says, “I will ask them about their spirituality. I will ask them what place it holds in their lives … It is a very critical and often neglected part of the work.”
What many therapists fail to realize is that religion is a source of great strength and support for many people. So though religion should only “[come] into the story as much as a client is looking for it to,” it’s still a topic that therapists would be remiss to overlook entirely.
At the same time, Khwaja acknowledges that many people of faith can be very resistant to the idea of going into therapy. She has had clients say, “I don’t know if I need to go to a religious leader, or if I need to go to somebody for counseling for whatever I’m going through.” This reluctance may be particularly common among Muslims, Khwaja says, many of whom have had therapists single out their faith as the source of their psychological problems. Add to this a cultural tradition of keeping one’s “dirty laundry” within the home, and it’s easy to understand the trepidation of many American Muslims.
It’s worth noting, though, that during Khwaja’s three years working at the NYC Administration for Children’s Services, consistently 50 to 75% of her caseload was Muslim clients and families. “So [therapists] not dealing with issues did not mean that [Muslims] weren’t having problems, or that their problems weren’t coming to the attention of social services,” she says.
Empathic understanding is a crucial component of effective psychotherapy, and Khwaja emphasizes that she works to address all her clients’ faiths the same way, regardless of religious affiliation. “I had a woman who had been through a lot of abusive relationships and she was extremely traumatized. And what would calm her down would be reading the Bible. If she was going into a situation where she was starting to disassociate I’d say, ‘At that time, you need to read the Bible, because it’s going to bring you back.’ So, if I’m not talking about religion and I’m not able to be comfortable having that discussion then I’m not able to work with her and connect her with a resource that works for her.”
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To continue the conversation with Maryum Khwaja, please join us on June 17th at the Social Work and Religious Diversity conference. Click here for information and registration.